Too true
(via masaki-muta)
Last year was a good year for me, but I seriously over-extended myself. I worked as a care provider for 5 kids, co-facilitated a weekly neurodiversity meet-up (and a weekly open studio event), volunteered with 6 nonprofits, raised money for Project Grow and the IPRC, and spent my spare time acting as an advocate for friends with Asperger’s (and a friend with Borderline Personality Disorder). My energy was diffused in too many directions. I made plenty of mistakes, but my intentions were good—to make a little bit happier (or reduce the suffering) of each person I came in contact with. Was I always successful? No. I fell on my face in the mud every week. My ego got in the way, my lack of social skills hobbled me, I ignored my (huge fluorescent blinking) blind spots, I neglected my creative interests, I stuck my foot in my mouth almost every day, and I got a few massive pies in the face. But I learned how to listen with equanimity, I learned how to hold space for others, I learned to self-medicate with spontaneous ridiculosity, I learned my limits and expanded my horizons, and I learned how to advocate for others in a way that preserved dignity and autonomy. (And I learned how to hang upside down from door jambs—a crucial skill which is going on my resumé). Goals for 2012: learn how to self-advocate; learn to take care of the care-giver; cast a light on my shadow side with gentle honesty; and learn to balance all the different aspects so my lifestyle is sustainable.
I’m grateful for all the friends who have helped me along this journey. Thank you.
Behind the hardness there is fear
And if you touch the heart of the fear
You find sadness (it sort of gets more and more tender)
And if you touch the sadness
You find the vast blue sky
(Rick Fields)
Widening the circle of compassion: it’s daring not to shut anyone out of hearts, not to make anyone an enemy. If we begin to live like this, we’ll find that we actually can’t define someone as completely right or completely wrong anymore. Life is more slippery and playful than that. Trying to find absolute rights and wrongs is a trick we play on ourselves to feel secure and comfortable.
(Pema Chodron)
At one time you were a mountain, at one time you were a cloud. This is not poetry, this is science. (Thich Nhat Hanh)
When one door closes, many more open.
Installation by Choi Jheong-hwa.
(via yjsk)
5 quotes from Thich Nhat Hanh:
In true dialogue, both sides are willing to change. (Thich Nhat Hanh)
When we develop concentration on interbeing, on the interconnectedness of all things, we see that if we make them suffer they will make us suffer in return.
(Thich Nhat Hanh)
Life is both dreadful and wonderful. How can I smile when I am filled with so much sorrow? It is natural—you need to smile to your sorrow because you are more than your sorrow. (Thich Nhat Hanh)
I am inviting you to go deeper, to learn and to practice so that you become someone who has a great capacity for being solid, calm, and without fear, because our society needs people like you who have these qualities, and your children, our children, need people like you, in order to go on, in order to become solid, and calm, and without fear. (Thich Nhat Hanh)
Smile, breathe and go slowly. (Thich Nhat Hanh)
Only to the extent that we expose ourselves over and over to annihilation can that which is indestructible in us be found. (Pema Chödrön)
I’ve been exposed to plenty of annihilation in my life: head injuries, physical assaults, accidents, relationship train wrecks, mental meltdowns, pervasive harassment. I’ve eaten pavement and stared down the barrel of a gun. TBI (Traumatic Brain Injuries) are intense and life-disrupting. I know what it’s like to lose my pride, my cognitive function, the ability to speak. I know what it’s like to lose jobs, money, my self-respect. I know what it’s like to lose my mental health, my confidence, my friends. The only thing that survived? That proved to be indestructible? My heart. It refuses to stop loving. And it’s gotten stronger.
When our attitude toward fear becomes more welcoming and inquisitive, there’s a fundamental shift that occurs. Instead of spending our lives tensing up, as if we were in the dentist’s chair, we learn that we can connect with the freshness of the moment and relax.
(Pema Chodron)